Oh god, I have a show on Saturday.
Why do I do this to myself?
Because when I see others ride in a show, I get all inspired and think "oh hey I can do this too!" and "It'll be fun!"
And then once I finally send in my show entry, the dread starts to build in slow increments. And about 48 hours prior to my public demise, I start to realize what I've gotten myself into. I'm there.
Loading up and driving to the show I will be a bundle of nerves- at some point during the drive I will try to rehearse my test in my head and realize I can't even remember my name, nevermind a complicated set of moves at certain letters in a white box we call dressage. While grooming my arms will feel heavy and I'll want to faint. Walking up to the warm-up arena will feel like a death march.
Once I get on, provided that I am still alive, and that my horse behaves himself, I will start to feel better. I will remember that I am here for dressage, I'll remember my name and how to do simple math. The tests will slowly come back to me. My legs will still feel like jelly, but I will be alive.
Ben and I had our last lesson pre-show last night. It was great. Definitely had moments of resistance, but I feel really good about where we are and our task at hand. What I am most concerned about at this point is how he'll take going to a new place and being ridden in a strange arena with lots of different horses, for the first time.
Should be interesting!